Sunday, March 24, 2013

WELCOME.


Infecting the Gyms will be a personal diary/weeping wall where I will document and follow the daily exploits of desperately trying to get into decent physical shape. I'm not morbidly obese or anything, it's just that there are definitely things that need improving. Hopefully this idiotic blog will play a small part in that. It will probably be an exact copy of Cardio Corpse, except with more failure. 

Motivation is a huge issue for me, because on any given day, I'd rather watch horror movies and eat Pringles instead of exercising. I've never been the sporty outdoorsy type, so convincing myself to crawl into the gym and punishing myself by way of lifting weights is pretty damn hard. My idea is that, by keeping track of everything I do right here in the open, where everyone can see just how much of a lazy piece of shit I really am, I'll somehow get motivated shamed into exercising. 

Here's some basic stats and info about me: 

  • 24 year-old Caucasian male
  • Starting weight: 67 kilos
  • Height: 1.70m 
  • Non-smoker
  • Light drinker (2-4 beers a week)
  • Non-coffee guzzler 
  • Non-soda drinker (I'll maybe have a can of Coke every once in a full moon)
  • Heavy junk food eater (at least a big can of Pringles or a big bag of Cheetos every week) 
  • Pretty much can't resist eating cake, cookies and chocolate every day. 

The basic exercise plan I intend to follow is this one. I don't necessarily plan to follow it to the letter, I just chose it because it seemed to be the most beginner-friendly of them all. I'm adapting it to my needs and likes, according to each gym session. For instance, I can't do any bent-over barbell rows without feeling like my lower back is going to collapse, so I'm skipping those, and I have also replaced the barbell curls with dumbbell curls, because I feel they give me a better range of movement. By way of my current accommodation, I have free access to a gym, but it's lacking certain equipment, such as the leg press machine, so I'm just doing barbell squats and dumbbell lounges. My gym routine usually goes as follows: I do a quick 5-10 minute session on the bike to get the blood flowing, I stretch for a bit, lift weights for about an hour then finish off with 20-30 minutes of interval running on the treadmill. 

As far as my diet goes, ehhh, things can definitely improve. I'm eating a decent amount of non-starchy vegetables (mostly broccoli, onions, tomatoes, salad, peppers and beans) as well as dairy products like milk, cheese and yogurt. Protein comes from eggs and chicken. I've been eating too much white bread lately, mostly as part of sandwiches. I'm not crazy about fruits, so I only eat bananas and grapefruits because they taste good. I don't really eat fast-food, but when I do, it's usually grilled chicken souvlaki with french fries and Greek salad, so I'm probably okay. All of this is sadly offset by all the fatty chips and corn snacks I eat every week, not to mention that not a day goes by without having some sort of dessert - cookies, cake, chocolates and so on. 

So, to begin, my first order of business will be a) to start hitting the gym on a regular basis and b) to stop eating every chocolaty thing that ever exists, although I will probably allow myself one cheat day per week. I'll keep daily records of whatever I eat and brief summaries of what happens in the gym. Also, there will be DEATH METAL. Lots of it. It's the best music to motivate you into doing that one extra rep. 

As with any serious plan, I am going to start it tomorrow, which also happens to be Monday. Until then, I am probably going to eat some more chocolate and then go to a death metal show at night. Cya later shitlords. 

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